- Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.
- Hospitality is making your guests feel at home, even if you wish they were.
- The world is full of willing people: some willing to work and some willing to let them.
- Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.
- If dogs had wishes it would rain bones.
- Stressed is just desserts spelled backwards.
- Birds have bills, too, and they keep on singing.
Wisdom
Henry Ford was once asked why, when problems arose, he typically visited his executives on their own turf rather than calling them into his office. "To save time," Ford explained. "I've found that I can leave the other fellow's office a lot quicker than I can get him to leave mine."
Mistaken Identity
Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next morning a nicely dressed young man came to the front door. "Can you start the breakfast by seven o'clock?" asked the minister. "I guess so," answered the man. "Can you polish all the silver, wash all the dishes, do the laundry, take care of the lawn, wash windows, iron clothes and keep the house neat and tidy?" "Say, preacher," said the young fellow rather meekly, "I came here to see about getting married but if it's going to be as much work as all that, you can count me out right now."
Practical Accessory
Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man was astounded by the wide selection of jogging shoes available at the local sports shoe store. While trying on a basic pair of jogging shoe, he noticed a feature and asked the clerk about it. "What's this little pocket thing here on the side for?" "Oh, that's to carry spare change so you can call your wife to come pick you up when you've jogged too far."
Name Game
When I was introduced to a couple visiting our congregation, I decided to remember their names by noting they were the same as those of two characters in a popular children's story. After the services, I stopped to talk to them and as they were saying goodbye, I teased, "Be careful going up that hill! But you must get that all the time." They smiled politely, but said nothing. After they left, my wife asked, "What was that all about?" "Jack and Jill. Up the hill. Remember?" I said. "Yes, but what does that have to do with," pointing to the couple, "Dick and Jane?"
Henry Ford was once asked why, when problems arose, he typically visited his executives on their own turf rather than calling them into his office. "To save time," Ford explained. "I've found that I can leave the other fellow's office a lot quicker than I can get him to leave mine."
Mistaken Identity
Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next morning a nicely dressed young man came to the front door. "Can you start the breakfast by seven o'clock?" asked the minister. "I guess so," answered the man. "Can you polish all the silver, wash all the dishes, do the laundry, take care of the lawn, wash windows, iron clothes and keep the house neat and tidy?" "Say, preacher," said the young fellow rather meekly, "I came here to see about getting married but if it's going to be as much work as all that, you can count me out right now."
Practical Accessory
Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man was astounded by the wide selection of jogging shoes available at the local sports shoe store. While trying on a basic pair of jogging shoe, he noticed a feature and asked the clerk about it. "What's this little pocket thing here on the side for?" "Oh, that's to carry spare change so you can call your wife to come pick you up when you've jogged too far."
Name Game
When I was introduced to a couple visiting our congregation, I decided to remember their names by noting they were the same as those of two characters in a popular children's story. After the services, I stopped to talk to them and as they were saying goodbye, I teased, "Be careful going up that hill! But you must get that all the time." They smiled politely, but said nothing. After they left, my wife asked, "What was that all about?" "Jack and Jill. Up the hill. Remember?" I said. "Yes, but what does that have to do with," pointing to the couple, "Dick and Jane?"
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