SOME THINGS TO GIVE YOU A CHUCKLE

You Know You Are Living in 2018 When...
1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You email the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that theydon't have email addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone
is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a website at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic, and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.

Observations on Growing Older

• Going out is good. Coming home is better!
• When people say you look "great"... they add "for your age!"
• When you needed the discount, you paid full price. Now, as a senior, you get discounts on everything — movies, hotels, flights, but you're too tired to use them.
• You forget names. But it's OK because other people forgot they even knew you!!!
• The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15 and you have a better chance of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.
• Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't remember.
• Remember when your mother said, "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"? Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!
• You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch..
• When GOOGLE, ipod, email, modem were unheard of, and a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.
• Your husband has a night out with the guys, but he's home by 9:00 P.M. Next week it will be 8:30 p.m.
• You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you've read it.
• What used to be freckles are now liver spots.
• Everybody whispers.
• Now that your husband has retired, you'd give anything if he'd find a job!
• You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet...2 of which you will never wear.

Short Thoughts

• The gyms have a special name for people who sign up in early January and then don't go: Profit.
• Here is wisdom: Today is the oldest you've ever been, yet the youngest you'll ever be, so enjoy this day while it lasts.