Puns So Bad They’re Actually Funny

These one-liners are so silly and stupid you can't help but love them

from bestlife.com

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity.

It’s impossible to put down!

The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar.

It was tense!

How did the picture end up in jail?

It was framed!

My ex-wife still misses me.

But her aim is starting to improve!

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter!

I asked a Frenchman if he played video games.

He said Wii!

Sure, I drink brake fluid.

But I can stop anytime!

My girlfriend thought I’d never be able to make a car out of spaghetti…

You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta!

Coffee has a rough time in our house.

It gets mugged every single morning!

What do you call the wife of a hippie?

A Mississippi!

Whenever I undress in the bathroom…

My shower gets turned on!

I was walking through a quarry…

I said to the foreman, “That sure is a big rock!”
“Boulder,” he corrected me.
So I stuck out my chest and shouted, “THAT SURE IS A BIG ROCK!!”

My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore.

Or else they’ll ground me!

What should a lawyer always wear to a court?

A good lawsuit!